She's Here!! Cara's Story

It's been several days since I blogged (11 days, to be exact) because I've been at home recovering, snuggling, feeding, not sleeping, crying and loving a precious, perfect baby girl!! It's been a whirlwind of events, emotions and new things, and I want to share with you (most) all that has gone on in the last week and a half. Get ready to read...

After all the debate of Cara's due date and wondering if she'd arrive on time (Aug. 30), late, in August or September, she decided to be right on time! I worked Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday of school, we went to small group that night, and as we were getting ready for bed on Wednesday, Aug. 29, my water broke at 11 p.m. I started laughing and told Chance. He immediately kicked into gear, said, "Yes!!!" and started throwing things in our bags. I reminded him that we had plenty of time, and so we took showers and gathered our things for the hospital. I started having contractions with intensity around 11:45, which made the end of getting ready pretty hard.

We let for the hospital at 1 and got checked into triage around 1:30. By then, my contractions were intense, regular and painful. It hurt to move, I threw up from the pain, and it was hard to get into my labor and delivery bed. A doctor came by to check on me, said I was progressing nicely and ordered my epidural. Hallelujah!! I got one around 3:30 and life got so much better after that! Mom and Dad arrived from Irving not too long after, absolutely giddy and exhausted from driving. They went to our house to sleep for a while, and we got some light sleep in the hospital room.

In the morning, my doctor came by to check on me, and I got a new fabulous nurse. She knew our family, and she was such a great combo of drill sergeant and mother. She took excellent care of me all the way to the end. Cayce, Mike, Cari and the kids came by in the morning too, and the general consensus from the doctors and nurse was that we'd have a baby by noon. I'd made lots of good progress, was feeling good from my epidural and was set to go.

Well, noon came and went, and I started getting a hot spot in my epidural. A spot on my left hip and my lower left back were still feeling a lot of pain. My right side was great--my entire right leg was absolute dead weight; it was pretty funny. They topped off my epidural, and that lasted until about 2:30. I ate some popsicles and ice chips, but 2:30 was the tipping point. My pain was a lot stronger then, and I was feeling contractions every minute. Chance sat next to my bed and held my hand while I breathed in and out and through them. He'd tell me when they were halfway done so I could see the light, and then I'd have 1-2 minutes to rest before the next one. This went on for almost 3 hours. Fun, huh? He barely had feeling in his thumb by the end. At 5, my doctor came in to talk. It had been 18 hours since my water broke, and I'd pretty much stopped progressing at this point. She said based on my labor thus far, it looked like I needed a C-section.

Here is where the emotions unleashed. I cried so hard from a mix of things--I was scared of surgery, so exhausted mentally and physically, in so much pain, so ready for Cara to be here, etc. I trust my doctor implicitly, so I was confident in her decision, it's just not how I envisioned the day ending. They prepped me (and Chance) for surgery pretty quickly, and I was rolled into the OR at 5:45.

I had to go into the OR by myself, and I was just crying and crying. I found a light on the ceiling to focus on and tried to pray, focus on Cara and stay calm, but I felt so alone in a room full of people. After I was set on the table, Chance got to come in and I was relieved. I still had my hot spots, and so they spent a few minutes adjusting my anesthesia. I was still feeling pain instead of pressure in some spots, and the anesthesiologist finally said, "Is it pain you can handle, or do we need to put you under?" Um, NO! Give me a bullet to bite on, I'm not going to sleep for the birth of my child. Of course he was a man... :) I did feel a LOT of pressure and painful pressure while they performed the C-section, and I said a lot of "ow, ow, ow, oh my gosh," etc. They said, "OK her head is out" and then "suctioning" and then we heard her cry. Not long after, they pulled her out and brought her around the curtain, and we just lost it. It was 6:05 p.m.

At this point, my emotions and anesthesia took over, and I got really fuzzy. I was awake, but I don't have memories until about 45 minutes into the recovery room. Chance says I kept asking about her birth weight (7 lbs, 7 oz--same as me!--and 20 inches) and if he was holding her. He took pics of Cara on the table, and then they wheeled me to recovery, where I slept and came out of my haze. I woke up with blurry vision, unable to form my words well, still really emotional, and SUPER thirsty, but they put Cara in my arms, and it was just the most incredible feeling I've ever had. She was tiny, beautiful, perfect and sweet. I just stared at her and told her I loved her over and over again. What a sweet, special time we had, just the 3 of us together.

Our families came in, full of excitement and tears, and we passed Cara around. I was feeling very shaky from the meds and very loopy still, so I got to have another nap to keep recovering. Our families left and they took Cara to the nursery and me to my new room. I was more exhausted than I ever had been before and was still kind of out of it.

Erik & Amanda came by to bring food to Chance (I couldn't eat until the next morning...) and to meet Cara! I may have fallen asleep in the middle of our conversations, but I'm guessing they understood. :) We got to have some sweet time with our girl in the hospital room before it was bedtime.

 We let Cara spend the night in the hospital nursery each night so that we could get some sleep. They'd bring her to me every 3 hours to eat, and then back after the morning nurse shift change, and she'd stay the day with us. I was in a lot of pain from the get-go, and very puffy from all the fluids from labor and recovery. I didn't get out of bed the first day, and it hurt to cough, laugh, shift in bed, etc. A C-section is ROUGH on your body. When they finally made me get out of bed, it took a nurse and Chance to help me shuffle about 3 steps to a rocking chair. The next day I could walk about 4 doors down from mine, but the next day I made a lap up the entire length of the hallway and back.

The few days after delivery were a steady stream of visitors and naps and loving on our girl. My doctor and Cara's doctor came by repeatedly to check on us--they are so great!!--and Cari brought the kids by for a cousins photo shoot. We felt really loved by our friends and family, and also overwhelmed by all the new things we were learning. Those days are a blur, but I will always remember our first days with our daughter, learning, loving, growing together, recovering from surgery--everything. Maybe I'll do a separate post on all of Cara's visitors!

I had such great nurses in mother/baby, both at night and during the day. They were such helpful, friendly experts, and I felt like I was in very good hands. I'm thankful Hillcrest has such a great staff. We were released to go home on Sunday, and it was an ordeal! We had several friends come to visit us before the first home Baylor game, and my parents had gone home to get the house ready, so it was just me and Chance to take her home. It was kind of a surreal feeling to be taking her home with us, but we were also ready to go. We dressed her up in her (giant) frilly gown, and I rode in the backseat, holding her hand. Chance learned quick to avoid bumps and railroad tracks because every jostle really hurt my abdomen!

As soon as we got home, we changed Cara's outfit and watched the Baylor game. Priorities, right? We cheered the Bears on to victory and hung out with Mom and Dad and Nana and Grandad.

For the last 8 days since we came home, we've been adjusting to sleep schedules, feedings, figuring out cries (hers and mine, ha!), taking naps with her on our chests, spending time with family, not cleaning or doing too much laundry, eating when we can, getting advice from friends and generally just trying to figure out our new lives! I'm so grateful Chance has 2 weeks of paternity leave from work--thanks, Extraco!!--because it's been so nice to do this together. He's such a help: when I'm up in the night with feedings and am sleep deprived, he'll get up to rock her or change a diaper so I can rest. When she fusses and we don't know why, it's great to have a partner to be with. When we have to get out to go to the doctor, it's essential to have another pair of helping hands. And it's just fun to be together and have these special days that we'll never get again.

Overall, Cara is a wonderful baby. Physically, she's perfect--gaining weight appropriately, sleeping and eating well for the most part. She likes to sleep and nap like her mama, and she loves to cuddle with her daddy. We've pretty much figured out eating, and I love making time for her every 2.5-3 hours each day. The schedule is demanding and grueling, but I do really love being the only person who can meet her needs that way--even when I'm falling asleep and head nodding at 3 a.m. :) We are still somewhat in disbelief that she's ours and finally here with us, and simultaneously wondering how we ever had complete lives without her. She is so cute, so fun, so wonderful, and yes, we're biased. We just spend our days kissing her cheeks, hands, feet, head, and telling her how much we love her. I know this stage will pass so quickly, and I'll miss it so much that I'm trying to soak it all up. She is so loved by so many, and we are so blessed that she's ours!!

I'll try to be more regular at blogging, but when I live my life in 3-hour increments, some things have to give. :) Congrats if you made it this far. Hope you weren't too bored. We'd love for you to come meet our little girl!!